News from The_New_News_

  1. Life isn't static. You don't just become confident and happy and stay there forever. What you do determines how you feel and who you are. If you go to the gym, eat well, live well, socialise, you become someone who's sociable, health conscious and happy. You can't put in no effort and still have good results.

  2. I completely agree with you about what you've said about your job. For the first time in my life, I enjoy going to work. It used to be this thing that I had to do for 8 hours. Now it's a chance to talk to people, work hard and do something of worth and push myself to do better. It feels very rewarding.

  3. I think this is true for those who are addicted. I just passed day 60 and it’s been extremely easy, and I’ve witnessed literally zero changes in my life. Prior to this, I viewed porn daily from ages 12-33. At this point, I do not consider myself addicted and I see more negatives to quitting than positives.

  4. I have a friend who smoked for years. One day, he decided he didn't want to smoke anymore, so he just stopped and never looked back. No withdrawals, no side effects. He just carried on with his life as he had before he started smoking.

  5. I think from a logical stand point, we'd all agree with everything you've written. That's what makes it so insidious. Like, you know it's hurting you but you still do it anyway.

  6. Well you'll be happy to know those days aren't behind you. I'm in a new relationship, and after almost a year of being porn free (with 5 or 6 relapses) I'm back to that place. I feel like a teenager again. It's a really nice feeling and it's good to know that the work I put in to be porn free was worth it and has tangible results.

  7. There is no growth without hardship. As shitty as this feels now, in the end, it will make you a better person. I know that this doesn't really help or make things better, but it's true.

  8. You are right. Porn is a defense mechanism. It might not have started out that way, but that's what it becomes with enough usage. When you rely on something to alter your mood for a long period of time, you don't learn any healthy mechanics to deal with your problems. Just as people turn to drugs/gambling/over eating, or anything else that instantly makes you feel good.

  9. You might want to look into neuroplasticity. It's essentially the science behind what you're saying. It's incredibly interesting, and I think it's useful for anyone with addiction problems. Changing your thought and actions literally rewires your brain.

  10. This kind of thought process has been around for a long time. In essence it's "think positive and you'll become positive". The difference now, is that this has been scientifically proven to be true. People believed it for years, but we now have the technology that proves that the way you think and act does actually rewire your brain.

  11. Hey, longtime addict here, word of advice:

  12. This is so true. It definitely gets better and it definitely gets easier. Another point to make is that if you keep doing nothing but watching porn, the loneliness will never leave. You have to go through the hardship of quitting for things to get better; there's no other way.

  13. Something that I've thought about recently is how I want to turn to porn when I'm horny. This seems so stupid because, alternatively to what you've said, if I'm horny enough to masturbate, why do I need porn?

  14. Something I've noticed after I recently relapsed after 95 days is that progress doesn't get lost like it used to. Going that long without porn must be rewiring your brain a lot more than something like a 30 day streak. It was barely a setback, for me.

  15. Thank you, i think this is what it comes down to. im leveraging a different means to obtain the pleasure i once sought from porn use by switching mediums and basically masking my withdrawal process with an arguably worse habit. I agree that it is a very toxic mindset and i need to be better and control it and be better

  16. This is exactly it. You're brain is used to a consistantly high influx of dopamine that is entangled with sex. Now that porn is gone, you're looking for that exact same feeling elsewhere.

  17. I think a lot of people delete their "stash" as a way of feeling accomplished. "I deleted my porn, therefore I'm getting better." The truth is, not watching porn is what heals you. Sure, deleting your stash can remove temptation, but it's not really affecting you immediately.

  18. The best thing I've learnt is: don't peek. Don't justify looking at porn just for a minute. Don't convince yourself that looking up models on instagram isn't porn, so it's not too bad.

  19. No one can tell you what to do. I'd say quit it forever, because that's how I feel after doing this for so long. I think the best advise is give it time, at least 90 days porn free, then see how you feel. I think that's enough time for you to realise how different you feel without porn, and make a clear decision of whether you want it in your life.

  20. Recently lost my 90 day streak; i feel your pain. Best advice i can give is to make sure you don't binge, get straight back up and onto your next streak. Also, learn from your relapse. If nothing else, this relapse will have taught you another trigger that can cause you to relapse. Now that you're aware of another trigger, you know what to watch out for next time. Each streak and relapse is useful for learning how you can go further next time, until you completely understand your addiction and how to avoid any more relapses.

  21. I experienced something similar. Managed to get to 93 days and relapsed a few days ago. During that time i achieved some pretty impressive goals. Got a new job, managed to move away from the small town i lived in and managed to finally end a relationship that i wasn't happy in but stayed because it was easy.

  22. Will it affect PIED and sexual desires? I can't say for certain but I highly doubt it would have any affect on them. As for whether it still damages your brain? Then it definitely does.

  23. That's a good attitude to have. Sex will always be present, especially on the internet. There's no escaping it.

  24. Peeking. Every time. "It's not technically porn to look at women on instagram, so it's fine". It's never fine. Moreover, it's just as bad as porn, as your brain can't differentiate between the two, so it's doing just as much damage.

  25. 17 days is nothing. Not to diminish what you've accomplished this far — in that respect, 17 days is a really good start. If we're talking about healing, 17 days is not enough.

  26. Just don't peek. It's never worth it and it's continuing the damage, as it's essentially no worse than porn. A peek always leads to a relapse, in my opinion. You just keep peeking until you peek when your resolve is weak one time, then you relapse.

  27. Inspiring, really. I stopped watching it about 5months ago, and I haven't looked back ever since. I think Seneca's saying, "Every night before going to sleep, we must ask ourselves: what weakness did I overcome today? What virtue did I acquire?" was a good start for me.

  28. Thank you for the video suggestion. Just watched the full hour long video. Incredibly interesting.

  29. I'm out. 92 days, a new personal best. Learnt about a new trigger, so not a complete waste. Still feel like shit about it, though. See you all next month.

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