“MoDeLs aNd SoCiAl MeDiA CaUsE EDs”- what caused yours?

  1. I always was the chubbier kid and I felt insecure about my appearance. My mom also had a big influence in it: commenting on things I was eating, telling me that it's good to be hungry and banning certain foods.

  2. If she does have those symptoms whilst overweight, she may have hypothyroidism. Its actually what triggered my Ed.

  3. A very similar thing reawakened my eating disorder. Some thing about me being thinner and therefore less sexually attractive made me feel safer. It also made me feel like if I made myself smaller, someone would want to protect me because I’m so fragile

  4. My mother was abusive and obese. I saw her face in mine when I looked in the mirror once, then I did everything I could to be as different from her as possible. Cue years of mental illness.

  5. Pretty much same as me, but with my father. Sad part is we both have mental illness, but at least it's in the opposite direction right💀

  6. Same as me. Only add in a father who abandoned me because I was an inconvenience and both of my parents fought hardddd to not have custody of me because neither wanted me. It even made a judge cry when I was 14 because he was so sick of my parents BS outwardly telling him in front of me how they didn’t want me. So my whole upbringing they would leave me alone, tell me I was gross from them neglecting me and telling friends I didn’t exist. Then cue in men/boyfriends who treated me the same. Ironically I was always the “pretty girl” with the best hair and clothes in my adult life event paid $20000 in plastic surgery and still hate my body. What’s worse is I look exactly like both parents so looking in the mirror is beyond triggering and makes my ED worse because it’s the only thing I feel like I can control.

  7. I honestly think it stemmed from me being praised as a child. I grew up as an objectively pretty girl who excelled in school and was constantly reminded of it. At around 11 I was confident but wanted to be the "best" and that's when I started restricting and exercising because that's what I saw being praised on TV/pop culture. I thought of myself as being pretty and didn't want to lose it. Honestly, the summer the ED developed I was binging America's Next Top Model and I used that as thinspo for sure. I don't blame my disorder on the media but I think that it did influence it. My parents have both always had a good relationship with food and have NEVER spewed any sort of diet culture torwards me. I had a great childhood and the ED is something that I believe came about from wanting to feel a sense of control and to stay "pretty" in the way that I saw was the most socially admired.

  8. Omfg same. The only difference is that I grew up and realized the people praising me were just inherently wrong and didn’t know anything. I was not actually as pretty as they thought. And now I feel like being thin is the only way to get back those kind of compliments for real, because the skinniest people have all their features popping out.

  9. My grandma making fun of my eating. More specifically, calling me a messy eater (even though she literally spills half hers on the floor), saying I was “greedy” when I had any kind of snack. Also hating a lot of “food words” and trying to avoid people talking about it.

  10. Getting picked on for how messy I ate was a factor for me too. I remember my father calling me a "wolf" and a "pig." Glad that asshole is out of my life.

  11. I was a chubby kid, I was always worried about my weight for as long as I can remember. My parents were bigger and always trying fad diets, maybe that’s what it was??

  12. My high school boyfriend constantly cheated on me with girls who were smaller than me, and would tell me he wouldn’t “have to cheat” if I were actually attractive.

  13. Body image issues have played almost no role in mine. I think it’s because I have zero sense of what I look like. I just became dependent on the feeling of control you get from restriction and I don’t know how to give that up. I was also very apathetic about myself and used it as a form of self-harm, I guess. Idk if I have a different experience because I developed restrictive issues as an adult.

  14. literally yes, I like the comfort I find in having the discipline to restrict. It even felt that way for me as a child.

  15. I needed to feel in control and I had pre existing mental illnesses that made it super easy to develop an eating disorder. Also I was a 15 year old girl 🤷🏻‍♀️ recipe (booooooo) for disordered disaster

  16. I've compiled a list of likely candidates: autism, trauma, being fat, my parents, dysphoria, marina + the diamonds, boredom, a desire for a slow yet controlled death, to be scarily skinny, being fat. Probably a combo

  17. Bro the twink aesthetic is hell, same with the femboy aesthetics because like I wanna be cute and gay but holy duck can it be triggering

  18. Feeling physically uncomfortable at my heaviest, hating what I saw in the mirror and how I looked in most clothes, wanting people to see that I was Not Okay, not wanting to grow up (biggest reason I guess). There were totally some "shallow" reasons why it started too, but they didn't have anything to do with social media. I just noticed that I was bigger than most of my friends and thought that being skinny had a prettier "vibe" to it than being chubby like I was. I thought it looked more elegant and aesthetically pleasing, I suppose. But I didn't even have social media until several years into my ED and I didn't watch much TV. And my most significant reasons of all have quite literally nothing to do with social media or beautify standards. They have everything to do with a fear of aging, "adulting" (hate that word but it conveys my point), having to find a role for myself and wanting people to treat me like I'm fragile while also leaving me alone?? somehow??

  19. imo beauty standards have contributed to that but most of the time there's something else, eating disorders work like coping mechanisms (to trauma, stress, perfectionism, the need for control, wanting someone to take care of you etc). Diet culture is one of the causes but eating disorders are more complex.

  20. My ED has nothing to do with body image. I do have body dysmorphia but it’s more related to how my face looks and my height, weight somewhat but not much. I actually have severe emetophobia, so my ED is closer to being ARFID or just anorexia (not nervosa). My severe fear of food poisoning and dealing with horrible IBS my whole life has driven me to starve myself out of fear of getting sick or seriously needing to use the restroom. Anytime I say I have an eating disorder, people always respond “But you’re already skinny!” “You don’t need to lose weight!” And it’s extremely frustrating because my eating disorder has nothing to do with body image or “fatphobia”. People forget that eating disorders stem from a lack of control in one’s life. Those things may contribute to ED’s but they absolutely do not cause them. It trivializes eating disorders to say that skinny models cause people to develop them

  21. my friends were borderline underweight and i was a heavier healthy weight. and then one day my friend showed me she could make her thumb and pinky touch around her wrist and i wasnt even able to fit my hand around my wrist. now i can fit my hand around my forearm but holy shite i will never forget that day

  22. My mother was obsessed with what I looked like and started weighing me weekly at 8 years of age. I couldn’t go on family vacations unless I lost weight, I couldn’t pick out my own clothes unless I lost weight, I couldn’t be loved by my mother until I lost weight. That’s how it started.

  23. I have an unrelenting drive for perfection and being the best at everything. So naturally I wanted to look perfect. Tyra Banks taught me what the perfect body was on ANTM ¯_(ツ)_/¯ I started googling eating disorder tips soon after watching. Then I had to do a food log for health class, and the rest is history!

  24. Likely causes of mine: genetically predisposed to addictions, trauma, growing up skinny, my sister’s ed, covid, diet culture, ocd, bullying, not getting help for other mental health and dysphoria

  25. Genetic predisposition, dysphoria, trauma, addiction and the act of restricting I guess. I got it in my head that being a girl means being thin at a very young age, mostly from tv shows and autistically misreading societal body standards tbh. The fixation I have on models and the old school pro-ed pop culture shit is something that came about at least four or five years into having an ed.

  26. My mom saying, "Well no wonder you don't have any friends, you're so fat!" I was in kindergarten and eating a cookie since she hardly fed us and it was all I could find.

  27. My mother dying at a young age, and my father being obese. He knew nothing about nutrition, and that went on to his kids. He was actively overfeeding me every day but then commented my thighs were getting really fat. This, and then leaving his house people started to comment on how much I ate. I feel a need to be completely different from my dad, even if that means dying from starvation.

  28. Always being told I was the skinny one. Trauma. Then suddenly not being the skinny one and having a couple ppl point it out. Wanting to prove I had the will power to not get fat. Also, having an anorexic friend who was around when I quit cheerleading and gained some weight. When she stopped telling me I had the perfect body that hit hard

  29. Honestly mine just sort of manifested somehow? I have memories being 5 years old looking in the mirror and thinking I had a huge pregnant stomach (didn’t, wasn’t overweight at all I just wasn’t a stick like some other kids) my mom never commented on her body in front of me or commented (negatively ) at mine, nobody did. I did become slightly overweight when I was 11 and then girls started bullying me but I didn’t really care at the time until a year later I just decided that I was a lard ass and then I lost a lot of weight.

  30. I started out being a chubby kid, got body dysmorphia and wanted to make myself happy, then spiraled when my life went to shit and I needed control :/

  31. I think it is physiological and we were predisposed. Something is off with brain chemistry and I wish I knew what the fu"& it was.

  32. My mother. I could look at the media and yeah want to be thinner but my mother’s comments were what always made me feel bad. I was 10 when she tried to get me to wake up at 5:30 in the morning to run on the treadmill. Mind you I was never fat, i just didn’t have a models body. I look back at my pictures and wish I could’ve known that I was perfectly fine. Now I look at myself and know I’m a little over weight but I know I’m not obese.

  33. I've been screaming from the rooftops that I'm dying for years and no one listens. of course if I find out that people could come to that conclusion by themself by simply seeing me standing in front of them if I only gave up food for a few months that's going to sound too good to be true. and maybe it is but maybe it's not. one way to find out yk.

  34. My aunt. I was 13 when I overheard her mention how much I ate to my mother. Then Family in general..was called the chubbiest, the fattest in the group, etc..

  35. My mom constantly calling foods “good” or “bad”, saying we should and shouldn’t eat things, acting like weight loss is the key to happiness and having friends, praising people who’ve lost weight and mocking people in larger bodies (which she herself was). As a lonely people pleasing desperate-for-approval kid I thought losing weight would fix everything 🤷‍♀️

  36. I was either not enough or too much for being the tall one, the loud one, the one with a large personality. , aka the cute/small girls were popular and said shit like "I feel so small around you". My mom has major eating issues as well.

  37. My dad and his wants for me to always be “perfectionist”, SA that happened for 6 years over and over again and need to control something, also my ex who kept calling me fat and unworthy.My mum who always was on diets and kept saying how fat she was, everything tbh

  38. Combination of doing beauty pageants when younger, unstable home life/ no food at my moms. I hoard food even if I don’t eat it because I want there to be food available if I do want to eat it.

  39. my mom was my biggest competitor. aside from that, 2015 tumblr was a HUGE factor, and my sisters. my mom would decline from cooking my family dinner because “she was fasting” and we had to make our own food so she wouldn’t be tempted to eat, so neither did i lol. and my sisters have always been pitted against me because we have different dads, so they ended up naturally skinny and very small framed. i have always been the opposite.

  40. Probably my brother calling me fat and ugly from the time I was in a literal stroller and my parents continuing the tradition

  41. My parents would call me fat and use my weight as the go-to point of criticism whenever we get into an argument, regardless of what it's over. Oh, and also my lovely relatives that call me chubby and tell me that I shouldn't wear sleeveless clothes (now I literally can't bring myself to wear anything that doesn't cover my arms and stomach)

  42. Stumbling upon proana content at 11, abusive family, low self esteem, stressful school situation, a desire to be perfect at everything I do... this combination slowly evolved into a full blown ED🤕

  43. I never feel "satisfied". I only feel "hungry" or "so full I'm gonna puke", no matter how slowly I eat. So I learned early that feeling hungry is better than feeling sick.

  44. My paternal grandmother who was so disgusted at my size that she told 6yo me to go home and run laps around the yard. My aunts boyfriend who took pleasure at calling 4yo me names because it made me upset - the more upset I got the worse the taunts became. My grandfather who called me a pig for gaining weight while struggling with anxiety/depression as a teenager. My sisters snide remarks about being so much smaller than me. Media to some extent but mostly my family. I’m 30 years old, the voice in my head doesn’t go away, it just gets louder and nastier.

  45. You’ve been surrounded by extremely cruel people most of your life. My advice that you didn’t ask for: physically move away from them all and never look back. It’s what i did and it worked.

  46. i think some of it probably came from gender dysphoria but a rly big memory is being on the veranda with my mum and grandma and them weighing and measuring themselves and talking about how awful their bodies were and i didnt think they looked different from me so i thought i must have looked awful too, that was when i was about 5. when i was 9 i got the american girls health book and it had a section on eating disorders and i realised thats what i was doing but no one took me seriously so it just progressed. now im 24 and i just want to feel ok with my body and that feels synonymous with being skinny

  47. I’ve come to the conclusion that social media definitely has contributed to it. But Id say the biggest part for me is perfectionism and overcompensating for other qualifies out of my control. So much I hate about myself, so trying to be skinny (which fluctuates so much for me) is one thing that works for me. Heck if I’m not cute other ways at least I’m skinny…

  48. the troubled teen industry. our diets were so strictly controlled to the point that people would share tips on how to hide eating from the staff, i got in trouble for not eating a fckn pear.

  49. My mum always talked about how fat she was and rarely ate. I was a tiny tiny kid so skinny naturally that my ribs stuck out and pants that fitted my waist were too short and I’m short as then when I was in high school I went on the pill and gained a little weight so I looked healthy wasn’t even big and my boyfriend cheated on me with a girl who was super super skinny like I used to be. So that triggered me into thinking that only super skinny was ok.

  50. Being a fat kid who had an unhealthy relationship with food. Tried to lose the weight, saw weight dropping, lowered calories for faster weight loss. It was history from then.

  51. Found my Mom dead when I was six and soon after all the adults in my life disappeared and the only adult interaction I had was with 'concerned' adults about my weight. My pediatrician only recommend therapy when I was ten hoping if I worked through the trauma of my mom's death I'd lose weight. Now I see weight loss as the most important thing in my life

  52. my mom, my siblings, getting my stomach fat grabbed and squished by bullies a lot, i vividly remember being told when i was 10 that i wouldn't be allowed onto a rollercoaster because they'd think i'm too fat when i was at a healthy weight to begin with then exercised until i puked and passed out 💀 also getting SA when i was starting to get ""curves"" and doing anything i could to suppress them so it wouldn't happen again

  53. was in a rlly bad place when i was younger (suicidal thoughts) + public schools in my city were extremely strenuous and hard so i was stressed out almost all the time so i started binging n that led to my bulimia and body image issues lol

  54. I had a B cup in 5 th grade. People commented on my puberty weight gain and haven’t stopped 15+ years later, instilling a deep sense of shame. In high school, I didn’t fit in, have friends, and I was the only black person in most classes.

  55. My mom.. She has very disordered habits and it keeps making me relapse. She has a habit of never finishing the plate, She will not be able to ever leave the plate empty even if its litteraly 2 bites, She just throws it away. Same with snacks, she will open a chocolate bar A TINY KINDER BAR and she will not finish it she will have to leave something to throw away and its always so triggering when we eat together and my plate is squeaky clean while hers still has a whole meal on it. Did I mention it's the same with drinks but worse she always leaves a half there. Slow eaters.......AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Or on days she is stressed she will litteraly only have coffee and she won't even drink the full thing. Anytime I lose weight getting closer to her weight she always somehow manages to go lower and then act like "Oh ive always weighed this much" when she litteraly lost a whole 5kg in a week or something. This is what I've known all my life since I was a kid, finding uneaten food in vases and under her bed, watching her weight herself all the time, She said she recovered but she really hasn't, Sometimes it feels like she is treating our relationship like a competition its really sad..

  56. I started with BED, when I was around 11 we moved and I suddenly had to get used to a new school, away from my friends, in a place I didn’t know my way around. I used food to make me feel less lonely. I started restricting when my mom seemed unhappy with my (inevitable) weight gain and taught me how to start weighing my food and dieting. I’ve been yo-yo-ing ever since.

  57. Racist bullying and isolation my entire life, body dysmorphia from being non-white in a white town, stumbling across ED tumblr at 15

  58. I was always fat. Always the fat child, friend, adult. I used to scratch my body all over bloody raw as a punishment for being fat when I was a young child. My mother always telling me to suck it in, and wear Spanx at 9 years old. Never being athletic bc no one wants to see the fat kid run but wanting to become athletic to lose weight. Tore myself out of family photos for being too fat.

  59. Depression, a bad influence in my best friend at the time (male,13,i was also 13), and close family constantly judging that i was too fat/skinny. It got worse at 15 after my first bf dumped me and i was really keen on "showing him what he lost". Oh but mostly the desperate need to be in control of something, anything at all,in my life

  60. Instability at home, s****l absue, long term trauma, violence and emotional abuse from mums husband, being much fatter than my mum when I was a child (I win now eh cos ive shrunk myself?), self hatred and a wish to unalive. Gotta be one or a combination of those.

  61. I think it’s a combination of family and beauty standards that were imposed on us very young, especially when you use to go shopping in places like hilister and ambercombie and they made you feel bad if you weren’t an XS, the media calling average sized women fat all over the tabloids and on reality tv shows

  62. Idk what caused it.I was already skinny and got praised/envied,but somehow it wasn’t enough for me and now I want to look sick/emaciated.It’s also kind of a distraction or a way of filling this “void” In my life.It makes me feel better about myself.

  63. Initially to loose weight after a comment made by an ex friend. That has now turned into a safety blanket I use to cope with not being able to comfortably confront my mom about certain topics and wanting to be unseen (safe) from men (personal reasons, take a guess 😐) Don’t really 🫠

  64. I didn't think models/social media was that bad or triggering. It was an upgrade from being in worse states of mind and around more negative influences. I've been really triggered and disheartened by people IRL and errors in judgment/naivety in people and society around ED's. I used to roll my eyes at recovery advice "avoid celebrities" and thought it was unhelpful and cliched. It's fear-driven, based on avoidance/bubble wrapping yourself and unsustainable/it doesn't help you tolerate society in the long run. I've had negative experiences with recovery in the past. I found myself feeling triggered recently by social media/celebrity culture after thinking it was no big deal

  65. SA at 13 & 14 years old, then it became a way of dealing with all emotions. I was in denial for the first 3 years about the ed. Some of it is about body image, a lot is about control and disgust of eating (feeling full)

  66. I hate this line. I’ve heard it from countless people and even from therapists in treatment centers and I feel like it’s very dismissive/implies that people only have EDs because they want to be pretty when many people with EDs want to be thin because of deeper issues. Models and social media have nothing to do with my ED or how it developed. My ED started because of 7 years of on/off bullying from a young age, emotionally abusive parents, and a fear of doctors due to a negative experience. I’ve been looked down at by medical and mental health professionals because they thought I was some dumb, shallow teenage girl who was starving herself because of Vogue magazines.

  67. My dad passed away when I was 6. My mum became very angry, violent, and insulting towards me & my little sister. My brain decided that if I was the same as I was when daddy was still alive everything would be okay and I still feel that way a lot almost 30 years later. At least now I know it's not possible

  68. Started with my mother, then being assaulted multiple times growing up i became so disgusted with my body it just kind of happened. Sure I see images of skinny people and wish I looked like that but I wouldn't say it caused it or nessisarily files it in any way?

  69. I just liked the routine. Get up, go to school, go home, work out, swim, workout again, eat, purge, and sleep. I liked watching how my body changed and it was all my work. I used to try to harm myself just to watch it heal and take care of it so its kinda like that. I have deep seeded hatred for myself but it was all really the routine I liked. Also, I was very lonely and my parents found out about my self harm and did wrist checks but they worked alot so they couldn't control what I ate and barely noticed under the sweatshirts.

  70. My parents' efforts to make me aware of what I'm eating at a young age because of a diet culture mom and a health freak dad + comparing myself to my teammates in artistic swimming + I was/am the chubby one in every friend group. Killer combo to give someone an obsession with calories!

  71. I don't think I can assign one direct cause. It was a lot of things that brought attention to my weight and body in a negative way that I internalized. Like my family was and is food insecure. We didn't have much and I was often scolded for eating. Particularly by my grandma who coupled with scolding used to pinch my hips and thighs whenever she caught me eating something I wasn't supposed to be. One time she even made a very insensitive joke about rape and my apparent child-rearing hips which my 13-year-old baby boy self did not take well. Still don't take well, it will forever haunt me. Or shitty doctors, I was told I was overweight multiple times when in retrospect I was average weight for my height and age at the time. All that and fifty million other things coupled with my ignored deteriorating mental health as a teenager really did a number on me.

  72. School shit, dating a boy who was emotionally abusing me through cheating, my parents (they should have divorced but didn’t), myself in general.

  73. My ex cheated and gaslighted me. He kept telling me I was nuts for thinking he and my best friend had something, but it was crystal clear to everyone around us. I didn't say much to not rock the boat - it was my first relationship and I didnt know what to do - but they kept shoving it in my face that they had something going on.

  74. id like to think a huge chunk is because of my family, always being told that i was a pig and comments about my habits, it giving me a feeling of control and happiness growing up in a place of abuse neglect and harsh arguments. i was always bullied as a kid as well and was always surrounded with girls who are smaller than me and getting more love than me, so i obviously picked up on the fact that skinnier=more love

  75. my guardian telling me to watch my weight when i got over double digits. i found edtwt and liked the aesthetic but got sucked into the rest of it

  76. I got fat from 14-16 and always overate to the point I felt so full I couldn't sleep every night. I knew I was eating way WAY too much and everyone around me tried to tell me I was just destined to be bigger and at least I had giant breasts.

  77. When I was 6 my father put an exercise chart on the fridge. My sister and I had to do a certain amount of various exercises to eat certain foods.

  78. My father only ever interacted with me to tell me how disgusted and ashamed he was because I was fat. Nothing in my life has ever made me feel as vindicated as him telling me I looked like a skeleton

  79. my highschool friends. one with (undiagnosed but obvious) ARFID, one with anorexia, 2 late bloomers with fast metabolisms. it’s not their fault though.

  80. I’d attribute mine to my family and teachers and kids at school. I didn’t realise it then but their constant body shaming made me start viewing my body like that.

  81. my mum. i’ve always been curvy and my mum grew up stick thin so she’d always be commenting on my body and saying i should just lose a bit of weight. she got what she wanted i guess 🤡

  82. got weighed at my doctors and noticed i had lost weight so my disordered brain said fuck it let's just keep this going lol

  83. There’s a whole society out there telling everyone thin is the ultimate pretty look,,, why would people blame models and social media? They just take advantage of the pre-existing social norms.

  84. My just deep self hatred and the old tumblr ana gothic pics. I always wanted to be so pretty and so delicate. I still am not over my Ed lmao. I eat but pretty much under a certain amount everyday. I can eat but I never eat too much.

  85. Got raped. Everyone at school knew about it. Information and lies got spread all over the place. I felt so out of control, especially with the police having all the power over the situation and myself having none. I felt in control after restricting and purging.

  86. cant think abt the emptiness and intense suicidal thoughts if I’m too focussed on exercise and calories instead !! #lifehack

  87. My mum being on a diet her entire life even though she was always healthy and slim. Constant diets, always changing but all the time. I’m now 27 and mostly recovered, she’s 54 and still on a fad diet.

  88. When I was a kid my aunt would see me eating and say comments like "yeah get those calories in" in a sacrastic tone. She would also say that the only was to lose weight was by closing your mouth and putting the fork down plus she would always say how much I needed to workout and she would hint that I was fat. My grandma also has a thing for admiring overly skinny actresses and models, she would always sound so happy when she'd say "just look at her! She's so beautiful and delicate. She's a little twig".

  89. For me, it started off with me suddenly being repulsive towards food. To where I couldn’t eat at all. Then the feeling of no appetite, no desire to eat, just made me spiral. I’ve always been over weight and gone through the crap that obese people always do. Ive always binged and wouldn’t leave any food on my plate (I was raised to where you eat all of the food on your plate or you’re wasting) I’ve always struggled with dieting, and when my appetite went away, it was also ironically the same time that I discovered ed tumblr. So I took advantage of physically not feeling hungry. Even when my appetite did come fully back, my want to eat did not. At that point, I was obsessed with counting calories, keeping up with burned calories, net calories, memorizing how many cals are in something, weighing myself everyday and sometimes several times in a day, and spending hours on tumblr (those from 2014 tumblr knows what I mean). What started off as no appetite, quickly turned into an ed. It started when I was 12, and 10 years later I’m still struggling with it. Even in recovery, I’ve struggled.

  90. It was a lot of things for me. One, I was already pretty depressed when I developed it and essentially used my ed as a form of control and to abstain from cutting- which worked for a while until it didn't. But in terms of what caused it a lot of things did, I think me being a trans man factors into it a lot because my body shape has always felt strange or offputting to me and a way of me changing this is obviously the behaviours I have because of the ed. Other things ig would be sexual assault I experienced and my abusive mother and a lack of control in many situations which restriction seems to make up for.

  91. Classmates would say some nasty things to me for being chubby and my mom would say things about my weight as if she wanted me to be healthier but it just made me feel terrible.

  92. Times that stuck out to me was the time my mom asked “are you sticking out your stomach? You look pregnant” when I was 13 in Walmart with her. That shirt puffed out weirdly and made me look fat, and also I was going through puberty and wow weight gain happens.

  93. Toxic shame. My father wasnt around and my mother was very hot and cold- she could be super loving and then just fly off the handle if I made her mad in any small way. I ended up internalizing it as a problem with me- “if I was better she wouldn’t do that to me.” And bc it would happen due to insignificant stuff, it made me think I was just bad to my core. Coupled with a move across country and a weird breakup/rejection and an eating disorder was inevitable lol. I’m also very hard on myself about never being good enough- probably bc of my parents lol.

  94. my mum, generally being overweight & invisible since childhood and now it is fuelled by “too skinny” and “ur so tiny” remarks, actually having people notice and compliment me and finding comfort in restricting and control :/

  95. Honestly beauty standards were the main one for me. My family are generally on the chubbier side so I realised if I wanted to be pretty I had to eat less because skinny = pretty (and also stuff that girls nees to eat less than men). I also copied the habits of other skinny girls at school I wanted to look like them

  96. A combo or sexual assault, domestic violence, being low income with younger siblings, and my doctor telling me to be careful to "not become like my mother" and "watch what I eat" when I was 9 🤷‍♀️

  97. I have always had a really low self esteem but it never really influenced my eating until I was about 13-14. I was at the low end of the healthy region on the BMI scale. I was upset that I was no longer underweight because I had been since birth and had always been praised for being thin.

  98. Being a dancer when I was a kid and then a swimmer in high school. I also developed hypothyroidism in middle school to make matters worse. My mom has a history with anorexia and bulimia and still struggles with it. I think it’s part genetic and part being influenced by her actions as I was growing up. I don’t think she set the best example with how a relationship with food should look.

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