Last girl I was with was named Moriah. But everyone calls her Mo. and well yeah, moaning Mo wasn’t very sexy. Kept thinking of the bartender from the Simpson’s.
I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love. It had been a while. In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went Since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10. I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons Through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops. Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips, Milky white skin and baby blue eyes. Name was Russell.
Tried reading a very popular romance novel where the man had my brother’s name. I made it maybe two chapters into the book. Nothing physical had even happened between the characters. I just couldn’t keep reading about how hot he was.
X Æ A-Xii
I’ve always been curious to know how it’s pronounced but never enough to look it up
I'm sitting here moaning names trying to pick one
Ha! Your neighbours are going to think you are having a crazy orgy with the worst named people.
Have bus seats near you opened up a bit?
Username checks out
Me too!
I once knew a girl named Michael. That'd have been weird.
My partner’s mother is named Mary Michael and goes by Michael. Those Catholics!
I misread that as "Michelle" 😆
Just for fun: in old Hebrew, Gabriel and Michael are both feminine names. Gabri.El (Lady Gabri) and Micha.El (Lady Micha).
Are you from Alabama? Because I knew a girl named Michael and her sister was Danny.
I knew a girl named Kevin
Last girl I was with was named Moriah. But everyone calls her Mo. and well yeah, moaning Mo wasn’t very sexy. Kept thinking of the bartender from the Simpson’s.
Haha this takes me mentally straight to the Flaming Moe episode.. Moe Moe Moe
Cletus
Damn it you beat me to it. Okay I have a similar bad name to add... Ill see your Cletus and raise you a Clem.
Just as he finds the cletorus
Or even Cletus' slightly less inbred third cousin, Trevor.
To be fair he married velvetta
And Clint
Most folk'll never eat a skunk but then again some folk'll like Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel!
Some Folk'll never eat a squirrel...
Adolf
There it is! Thought it would be much higher tbh.
If it's a threesome with two adolfs then you could just moan "Oh Ades"
I was going to say Hitler but this counts too
They said the worst not the best smh...
Oh ja.... sehr gut
Someone in Italy is moaning out the name Giuseppe.
Someone in Mexico is moaning out the name Eugenio… yikes
Oh jebeddiah
Jeb rolls off the tongue better
JEB KERMAN TO THE MUN
Looks like Valentina is getting some action 😏
Moaning the name Bartholomew has to feel so odd
Came here to say Bartholomew, get out of my head
Barry
My first thought
Barth for short
all these names sound british💀
British people get no bitches confirmed???
Gertrude
That's why I moan "Aunt Gertie". Rolls of the tongue better
It screams 99 problems and teeth ain't one
Humphrey?
“Hump me Humphrey!!”
Lmao why isn’t Humphrey getting more upvotes
I disagree. Do the Humphrey-Hump, a-doin' the Humphrey-Hump.
My husband's name is Russell but he goes by Rusty, both options are awful.
Just need one of those 80s moms accents.
I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love. It had been a while. In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went Since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10. I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons Through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops. Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips, Milky white skin and baby blue eyes. Name was Russell.
Bullshit! Call him Russell the Muscle!
😢
Harold
Walter
waltuh
White
This is my ex father in law’s name, thanks for the horrific image omg lol
Kimjongunnnnnnnnnnnnn
Xiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
Jared Fogel
I’ve met Jared Fogle at two different Subway franchisee conventions
"He went to Jared!"
Rikkitikkitembonosarembocheriberiruchipipperipimbo
“Has fallen into the well!”
Funny you should mention that name...I often say it out loud. I like the sound of this name, but I think it would be difficult to moan. Although.....
Reminds me of rikki tikki tavi too. Another terrible name to pronounce that also brings back memories.
Oh yeah Karen. Tell me what a little bitch I am.
🤣🤣🤣
Helga
Oh I dunno, Helga the She-Wolf of the SS has a certain ring to it. And now I have a boner, thanks.
Yeah Helga makes me think of a big, thick, Swede or German who wants to be punished.
Hufflepuff?
Just scrolling hoping I don’t see my name don’t mind me
Same
Austin
Weird I always say sufferthroughit during sex
To moan: her sister's name.
My sister has a relatively commom name. Whenever I see someone with her name on a dating app I have to skip. Great people but just no
Tried reading a very popular romance novel where the man had my brother’s name. I made it maybe two chapters into the book. Nothing physical had even happened between the characters. I just couldn’t keep reading about how hot he was.
Sheldon …Iykyk
Do it to me, Sheldon.
Bertram
I feel like if you moanes Peter it would just sound like Lois calling peter
OHHHHHHHHH PERCIVAL!!!
WULFRIC
Oh yes, Purvis, give it to me
My voice strained with all of me overcome with exquisite pleasure, I could imagine hissing Mildred into her ear.
smelvin
Reginald
Oh...Zarathustra...
Thus moaned zarathustra
Geraldine
Grandma.
Thats a title sir, not a name lol
Marge
Gilbert
Olga
I had to scroll way too many names before seeing this abomination of a name
Ooooh… Hortense🤮
OPTIMUS PRIME
"Bounce that ass Mildred." Bahahaha.
Need to find a Mildred to test theory
Angus
Obligatory Dick
I work with a Marnie. No way am I moaning that.
Grupert Eddington Bastille the Third.
mid-thrust: "GRUUUU!"
Candice
my moms name
Balthazar
John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt.
His name is my name too
Keith, Bart or Fenton.
Nate. By far. It’s the most unnatural thing to moan
Gotta say Nathan. Though I have never met a sexy Nathan.
Oof. My son may find it hard to find a lover in his later years.
Uncle roger
Mom. I win
Burt wins so far gor me
Gerard. Why di you think they call gerard way "gee" in fanfic lol
“No, you did not have great sex with Sheldon.” “You want your taxes done, Sheldon is your man.”
If you need a root canal, Sheldon's your man. But ‘Do it to me, Sheldon.' 'You're an animal, Sheldon.' 'Ride me, big Sheldon.' It doesn't work.
Donald
fuckswithducks
"Ah I'm cumming Mr. President !"
Oh yes Paul Paul…..paaaaaaaaaaaul
Interpol
You moan it pauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuUl
Ohhh, Philip!
Agamemnon
Clytemnestra!
Hubert
Basilforth
Carl, that kills people!
Her predecessor’s
Larry for the masculine and Barbie for the feminine.
Ironically....Myrtle
Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramirez
I work with a guy whose first name is Dwarakhnadh. I can't imagine he's heard "Oh, Dwarakhnadh!" too many times in his life.
Algernon
I was downvoted by an Algernon.
For a woman’s name, I think Maggie would be pretty bad
gregory
Archibald.
You’re ex husbands name while ur fucking ur current husband
Rufus
merideth
I dated a Meredith. Name never bothered me.
Volva
Dolores!!
Milton
Obama
Odd to moan someone's last name hahaha
Oooooooohhhhh bama
Kevin.
Hmph-That was my last fuck buddy’s name. Just realizing I called him “baby” in bed but never any other time. Solid answer.
Keith
Skeeter
Ohhhh Gretchen! Ohhh helgaahahHh
Pretty much any German name cause if you say them right you have to sound angry.
Melvin
Bartholomew
Elon
Mohammad
That’s literally the most common first name in the world 😂
You’re exes
Ouch
Reginald
Huwbert
Melba
Mulva
rumpelstiltskin
Ralph
Keith.
I don’t know but this thread got me laughing so hard. 😂
harold, hilda,
Evelyn. Gladys. Gertie. The women my mom played mah-jongg with every Thursday night in the 80s.
Evelyn sounds kinda cool tho
I take offense. I was the woman playing mah-jongg with your mum. I was there. Grandma for a reason.
Martin, George, Keith, Burt
Annalise because it's pronounced anal ease.
Coral !
Richard, when he says he prefers Dick.
Gertrude oh Gertrude
Kamala
Everything is great until you see your name in the comments
Saw this same question on AskReddit a while ago, remembered this comment:
Aviato
kyle!!!!!
Irving
Your parent's names
Elon
Osama, Phil, (Unless you make jokes about him "philling" you up), Maggie, Gary, and Guy
Oh Dwight, give it to me harder!
Olga
Sum Ting Wong