Had the two best back-to-back dates of my life in the past week. She just texted me she felt “the chemistry wasn’t there.”

  1. I know this may not be the answer you're looking for, but the reality of the situation is that unless she tells you something otherwise or your neighbors tells you a different reason, you kind of just have to accept the reason she gave you. Rejection sucks. Especially when you put yourself out there and you very clearly like the other person. I know it's easier said than done when it comes to just not thinking of all the what ifs and what the real reason was but just use that good experience and what went well on that date in your future dates and eventually you'll come across someone who feels the same about your chemistry. And also just know it is okay to take some time to feel sad and process your emotions and thoughts.

  2. Better this way, after a couple of dates, than falling in love then getting dumped. I went out with this guy for 2.5 months. It was the best chemistry I’ve ever had with anyone, and he would tell me the same. After about 2 months he just started pulling away and broke up with me. When I asked him if he even liked me still he said he didn’t know anymore. I’m so heartbroken. You’re lucky. Feel lucky that she told you now before you fell in love with her.

  3. In my experience, guys that date you and say they "don't know" means something happened in their life and they're busy either fixing it or going through it. My friends and me do this when we were depressed or were going through alot of shit at once. Society made us think we can't be vulnerable so we won't communicate our troubles. But we should

  4. Isn't this the entire point of dating? The two of you went out a couple of times but she just wasn't feeling a spark. Unfortunately you were. That happens sometimes. It's sad but it seems you both handled it maturely. The last thing you want to do now is to devolve into hyper overthinking about possible things you may have said or done, etc. that lead to this outcome. You didn't do anything wrong and neither did she. It just didn't work out. Hold your head high and move on.

  5. I’ve definitely experienced this before. You have to understand that just because you have a good time with someone, it doesn’t mean they felt the same way. And even if someone has a good time with you, it doesn’t mean that you’re meant to be romantically. I’ve had fun and interesting dates with a bunch of guys who I was not compatible with. I’ve also had guys tell me how into me they were only to ghost me. There’s never really a good explanation for how people feel. Sometimes you really just can’t see it happening romantically.

  6. Wow between op’s post and the responses, this has been on of the healthiest threads this subreddit has ever had. Kudos to all.

  7. Bless your heart, you sound very sweet. sometimes in life my love, things just don't work out. we look for a reason and closure to make sense of the situation, we can't accept that sometimes people just aren't feeling us so we start to hyperfixate like you are now, was i too desperate? am i ugly? annoying? etc etc, sweetheart you are who you are, if someones not feeling it, thats ok, someone else will. she couldn't have been the right person for you if she wasn't feeling you. no ones obligated to like us nor are we entitled to that, i don't think you should do what some of the comments suggest and stop being an open and loving person, i think you should maybe just re-evaluate the expectations you have from someone within the first few interactions to save yourself from what you're doing now which is beating yourself up. I promise you you will find someone who will make you feel so grateful things never worked out with this girl. Sometimes we don't get the closure we are looking for, we just have to accept it and keep moving. You had a good time, now you are free to meet someone new. Keep your head up boo you'll be just fine I promise :)

  8. Damn I think I needed to hear this a year ago. I’ve become very bitter and I don’t know how to go back to how I was. I’m constantly one foot at the door waiting for the other to leave.

  9. Just wanted to say you made a lot of sense and you write really well. I read that twice and felt like you were speaking to me. Great advice. 🤙🏽

  10. I think you're spitting facts here. He also said something like "I'm happy to be friends" when actually he's really sad about it but he's just prioritizing her comfort with dumping him over his own emotions. He doesn't even need to beg or plead or dump his emotions on her, but to actively lie on his feelings for her benefit, in a moment where he's hurting, shows a lack of self love. As I was reading his post I thought the same as you: he put her on a pedestal. The truth is most people, regardless of gender, do not want to date someone that pedestalizes them to that degree.

  11. Sorry man. That’s a bad feeling. Oh well though. There are 3.5 billion women on earth right now. Don’t sweat this one.

  12. You might be right. Or it might just be really the case that she just didn't feel a click at the end. Even if OP did everything perfectly the outcome could still have been the same. We can't really conclude whether OP is the problem after just one rejection.

  13. There is a difference between being a desperate nice guy and a gentleman. Opening a door for someone and listening well will definetely make a good impression. You just don't need to exaggerate too much and keep your dignity to show selfconfidence. On the frist date people always want to show their sweet side, which is totally okay. Your "you want to be human" advice seems missleading to me and might encourage people to show themselves less exited than they actually are.

  14. I wouldn't call it a breakup text since you only saw each other twice and weren't in a relationship. You can't make people attracted to you or love you, they either feel that way or they don't.

  15. If one person is over the moon attracted to someone right away and the other person isn’t there yet or not at all it can be really overwhelming and uncomfortable. If someone tests the waters a bit and still doesn’t feel it while the other party is even more into them it’s just not going to work out. You’re not compatible and can’t make people feel something that’s not there. It probably was magical to you and maybe it felt awkward and forced to her, or she thought it was ok until it wasn’t ok anymore for whatever reason if something was said or done that gave her the ick.

  16. Yall went on two dates. That's not a breakup. She obviously didn't feel the same. It's not the end of the world just keep looking.

  17. Bro! I was ghosted by two different girls (from different countries also) almost back to back last July and September. In the first case, it happened after five dates which I thought were magical! Lots of kissing, hopes, dreams... All to end up with a "I wish you all the best with your future endeavors"

  18. She did get out of a relationship in the last four weeks or so. Maybe a pretty big factor for her. I probably wouldn’t want to jump back in so soon either now that I’m really thinking about it.

  19. women say they don't feel it but I think they just weren't sweep off their feet, the right guy would totally make you change your mind, but who knows that's what the books say lol, like some people say, it could be a dozen reasons why that happens haha.

  20. Aw I’m sorry. Don’t be sad and don’t internalize any of that. Take her words honestly when she says she’s just not feeling it and don’t assume anything is wrong with you - you are perfectly fine just being you and the right person is gonna accept it fully. I’m very emotionally intelligent and am able to connect with people easily, no matter what background they’re from. I love good conversation with good people and this has led to great dates with guys who are truly catches 👌. But I just wouldn’t feel the connection and I’m not one to force it so I would tell the guy that I’m not interested but that I had a great time and would like friendship - lol usually this is where the guy doesn’t want to talk to me anymore. Anyway - I just want to say from a perspective that can relate to her side - there’s no reason you should feel anything is wrong with you. You two definitely had something great - you can trust that. It’s just that she didn’t feel IT. There’s so many people out there and only ONE to choose. You’re gonna want that one to be sure of you

  21. Had the same thing happened to me but only after talking to this girl for a month or so and going on 1 date. Spent like 3hrs with her and thought it went great, first time I felt hopeful after my 4 year relationship ended that was a wreck. Rejection sucks buddy, take sometime and dont rush into anything until you're ready again.

  22. Don't overthink this. Assume that she's looking for a blue Toyota and you are a red Ford. For whatever reason you aren't what she's looking for.

  23. It’s fine to be bummed that your feelings towards her weren’t reciprocated but try not to overthink. How many people do you know/have met and don’t view in a romantic way? Part of dating is meeting people and seeing if you feel chemistry with people and sometimes you just don’t, doesn’t mean you didn’t have a great time with them or think they were a cool person. For me, I see a first date as a ‘would I be open to seeing this person again?’ and the second date a ‘do I have romantic feelings towards this person?’ When I’ve called it off after the second date, it definitely doesn’t mean that I had a terrible time, just that I don’t feel the chemistry to keep going.

  24. Chemistry is subjective and has nothing to do with attractiveness. You could be the most attractive and funniest guy, and a hundred women would find you incompatible, even if they enjoy talking with you.

  25. She’s not attracted to you. Also kinda sounds like you are a bit of a Simp, and not assertive.

  26. First thing coffee date .. that’s a friends thing right there. Number 2, do You want to be her man-bag following here around like a puppy? 3. You sound way too keen for someone you just met. To have chemistry means that you have to be a man, not a soft new male friend. Given that you’re falling apart after 2 dates means she made the right decision.

  27. You handled it really well in the text you sent back to her. Sorry that happened but she’s not for you. Just keep doing what you’re doing and you’ll find the one who feels the same towards you that you feel for her

  28. I know it sucks when you get excited about someone and it ends for whatever reason. But I think you shouldn’t take this personal, because at this stage it’s really not. Her reason is valid, chemistry is important and she wasn’t feeling it.

  29. Been there many times. It really sucks. The most salient time was a first date that lasted 2 hours (and all we did was get ice cream and then sit talking for 2 hours). Afterwards, she actually asked me out for a second date before I had a chance to.

  30. Sounds like you got friend zoned bro. Women don’t really have any awareness of wasting guys time so if they enjoy your company they will spend long periods of time with you even if they have no intention of being anything more than just buddies. You proably need to work on being a little more aggressive as far as making moves and do a little bit of push pull. By push pull I mean that super fluid conversations aren’t really a good thing all the time. For a girl to get attracted there has to be a little bit of tension. Also based on your reaction you sound super desperate which means you proably gave off a lot of desperate vibes and that’s a huge turn off for women.

  31. Here's my take, as a woman: On the first date, she really enjoyed spending time with you. I bet you asked her questions about herself, said some funny things, the date changes location, so there's 'stuff' to do. etc. So, boom, date 2 gets scheduled.

  32. Sending you love, OP, as this situation is stinky but we have all been there. On the bright side she at least let you know straight up rather than being ghosted (which hurts way more). You are a wonderful individual I’m certain! Sometimes people have a wonderful date but don’t see themselves with the person longer term past that + don’t want to waste your or their time exploring the relationship when it’s not what they’re looking for. Unfortunately we don’t usually get further explanation than that.

  33. I know this sounds harsh, but in the long term you’ll be more well adjusted if you accept the fact that 100% of the time when a woman says “the chemistry isn’t there” she is really just politely saying “I have zero physical attraction to you”, and thats okay. In reality, it’s her loss, not yours. Move on, don’t ever think of her ever again, and go and find somebody who does feel “chemistry” for you.

  34. this has happened to me a couple of times. i never really knew why; it always seemed like everything was perfect and it was finally happening. then the girl suddenly gives you some absurd reason and tells you that it was nice knowing you. what i realised when i talked to my other females about this is that there usually a ‘better option’ that comes around. its really not you, but the girls probably trying to get the best deal. dont worry king, you’ll find someone who values you for who you are. cheers!

  35. Hey there, even though she may have liked spending time with you, she may have not felt the passion or the feeling that comes with being in love. Maybe she realized that after you guys hung out more. She at least told you the truth instead of leading you on. It’s hard, but she is helping you move on by being honest. I hope you feel better soon :)

  36. I’m sorry this happened to you, man. It’s OK to be sad…you liked her and it did have the potential to be something great. Your reaction is natural.

  37. Happens a lot to my mom and she is 62 lol. Will always give a guy 1-2 dates even if she doesnt REALLY physically like him but if she doesnt "feel" any attraction in 1-2 dates, its over.

  38. Generally, not feeling the chemistry is polite code for "i have no desire to fuck you". Dates might have been great, amazing conversations, shared humor yada yada from her pov too, but she doesnt crave your dick. I feel you bro but it is what it is. Carry on!

  39. By showing her you like her IT DOES NOT mean you appear desperate. That fucking narrative needs to die. If you like someone, then show it, whatever the outcome is afterwards. Whether it's the first or the 10th date. That is what people used to do before this social media swiping dating world and it worked out for us thus far. This creepy desparate narrative is so shallow and social media centric cringe that it hurts to hear about it.

  40. Problem is, it’s all him and he is too distracted with everything else. Now, he could fix his intoxicated mind with being the "good boy" but chances are that he won’t.

  41. Rejection is protection. This might not have went like you anticipated but your person is still out there. Don’t give up. Good luck ❤️

  42. best thing op should do rn is to delete her number, if for some reason she text back he could invite for another date but from what he describes the chances are pretty slim.

  43. Seems like you are just way too entranced by her and you were mostly paying attention to your own infatuation and wasn't reading her accurately at all.

  44. Well OP. Remember ‘it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’. It was good enough for Shakespeare. It should be good enough for you too.

  45. Deep breaths man, it’s not the end of the world. It sucks to experience but that’s life and you’ll grow from it.

  46. I’m sorry you’re hurting, this is never a fun situation. There’s likely no signs you missed or way you could have prevented this, so try not to beat yourself up about it if your mind starts to wander there.

  47. Dating is hard. It feels like so many things need to align or at least be close to aligning for it to work out. Right place in life to meet each other, right maturity level, compatible communication needs, etc.

  48. Girls are not the same anymore man. You got to expect to never see someone again after even having the best night of your life and you will never be disappointed. These days people have no clue who they are more so now than ever. I'll never understand it and neither will us bros. Just take it as a blessing that maybe you dodged a bullet. She could be insane and could have been a buzzkill once you started dating.

  49. Happens when you like someone too much. Date someone who you don’t care about instead. They flock like flies and you can be yourself and confident

  50. If she's recently out of a relationship that could be it. Honestly be friends and act like that convo never happened. Just focus on being the best you you can be. Doing this will make you forget about her issue and you'll be a good friend for her and a happy balanced person for you. If she becomes more emotionally available she could become attracted it she might not but at least you're not wasting time being sad over such a short thing. Some women push men away to see if they are confident and capable of being happy alone.

  51. If she breaks up with you and you’ve been on more than one date, and you didn’t do something awful to her, it’s almost always another man. Gotta close the deal quicker.

  52. You can never know the real reason unless she tells you. It could be anything, she is not over her ex, she was dating someone else at the same time and decided to continue with them or she simply wasn´t attracted to you enough.

  53. Cannot think of much worse than following her to a nose piercing appointment. That part just doesn’t make sense. She was probably not keen on the idea to start with and wanted an early out. Maybe you surprised her with convo but by the second date she made up her mind.

  54. Gorgeous women have a lot of options. They are going to pick a guy that provides the most amazing experience. She will go with the person she has the best time with. I don’t think coffee and a French restaurant sets a good tone. Try to be more exciting next time. Be thrilling, be sexy, etc

  55. This is stupid to say. Clearly the girl wasn't in to him and he could move heaven and hell and that wouldn't change.

  56. Here's the thing. It is her and not you. Being dumped hurts like a mfer yes. There's so much more out there. Not a great pep talk sorry. Keep on trying cause you'll make some lady very happy💃💗

  57. Well first of all, you didn't "break up". You went on a couple of dates. You seem pretty broken up about someone you barely knew and using terms like "break up text" when you weren't actually together. Perhaps you were putting out some desperate vibes? Maybe she's newly single and just wanted a good piping and you come along with your teddy bear vibes? All you really can do is move on with an abundance mindset.

  58. Aww I’m sorry. Could be a million things. She sounds gregarious. Maybe you weren’t exciting enough. Or maybe she’s an under cover freak and you’re too vanilla.

  59. You didn’t escalate during the first date. You held hands and lightly kissed goodbye (on the cheek or lip??!)…. On the second date. How old are you brother ?

  60. This is how girls operate now. They lead on multiple guys at the same time then pick and choose who they want. They have no respect for guys at all anymore it’s jus a big game to them. A damn shame.

  61. Her loss brother. She’s probably not ready for something serious and if thats the case you dodged a bullet

  62. “The chemistry isn’t there” = You’re not masculine and dominant enough that I trust you can lead me and make me feel like a truly feminine woman. You’re too soft/sensitive for me and I need someone with strength, more than you.

  63. I've always been curious of these rare stories that buck the trend, where another go at a relationship overcomes something that didn't work out at the beginning. What did she text you? How did the two of you restart? Did you talk about why it didn't work vs how it might?

  64. You made yourself too available, that’s it. Extending the first date by four hours at a nose piercing appointment was the deal breaker in my opinion. It’s not a romantic or intimate setting. It’s like be my friend and help me kill time while I run an errand. Should have ended the first date after the hour and kept her wanting more and knowing that you had other stuff to do as well.

  65. You came on too strong dude! She felt smothered and pushed you away. You have ZERO interest in a friendship, so now you're lying to her. Tell her "I have no interest in a friendship, I want to date you. Reach out to me if you change your mind." And NEVER contact her again! She has to reach out to you man

  66. Not sure why I got downvoted. Maybe my message was misconstrued, so I'll try again. I was saying I agree with you. I think it's very mature as a man to be willing to say how you feel instead of saying what you think they want to hear, which is "I understand I'm happy to be friends." My concern, and what I wanted to get your opinion on, is that why would we, as men, want to tell the girl how we feel and if they're the ones breaking things off. It seems like we're trying to put way more effort in than them, when they clearly don't really care about us if they're breaking up over text. I ask your opinion cause I had something like this happen to me. Thanks.

  67. "nose piercing appointment" - yup stopped reading right here ,thats all you need to know you dont want to date this girl. just walk away and dont look back you're better off without her she aint the one

  68. Unfortunately some people are very charismatic and “sparky”, so when we’re with them they have the power to make us feel like we’re the only people in the world and that they really like us. The truth is, they have the ability to make anyone feel like that. The fact that you had such a good time might’ve not been indicative of the connection you two shared, but her personality. So we feel the spark, but the spark was just the other person being themselves. Rejection does suck, and it seems like this one came out of nowhere. You gotta respect her answer and just move along.

  69. Man, second date and your writing pity posts on Reddit. Come on, it’s a competition, she is fundamentally more interested in other people than you. It sounds harsh, but this is life and you really cannot get so down about such mundane event.

  70. I would move forward and forget the friend idea. You only seek friends when youre not looking for a relationship. In this case you are seeking. And any possible distractions for the future should be avoided. Delete her number and move on (if a number was given)

  71. You’ll never know the true reason why but you’ll have to go off of what she said. I did the exact same thing after a first date with a guy that I met a month ago. I sent him the same text as she sent you. My real reason was that I just wasn’t over my ex and didn’t want to lead him on bc I knew he was interested. I just didn’t want to go into it and tell him about my ex .

  72. A lack of chemistry doesn’t have anything to do with who you are as a person or what you might have done differently. Even though the two of you might have genuinely had fun, she just wasn’t interested in moving forward. It happens. At least you got two nice dates out of it. On to the next one.

  73. I've been on both sides of this, after a few dates and sleeping together, they decided there wasn't a 'spark', which baffled me because I thought we had fun and wondered why it took so long to figure that out. Honestly this gave me a bit of a complex that there was something wrong with me, but equally I've been on the other side so you just have to realise that your experience wasn't their experience, and I'm very aware that I can have fun and a good time with someone but it's not necessarily enough to want to date them.

  74. Lots of good advice here and you seem like a decent guy. I’d also be wary of allowing first dates to run on and on. It makes you look very available, like you’ve got no other demands on your time and people in your life. That’s not actually that appealing. It’s nicer to feel like a busy man has carved out time to spend with you than it is to feel like this man will hang around until I actively tell him to go. Don’t be afraid to keep first dates short. Give her an hour and a half, maybe, and leave her wanting more, rather than instantly giving up hour and hours to just follow her around.

  75. I’d say you left the situation with grace but know that it’s probably a her issue. She’s probably being honest with you when she says she didn’t feel chemistry; granted that sometimes it takes more than two dates but sometimes you just know.

  76. Self reflection is great and important, but here I think you just have to take her word for it. I've met many men in my life who were lovely people, not at all ugly, that I enjoyed talking to but had 0 romanic intrest in. It's just life. Sorry man.

  77. Two dates you are calling it a break up, are confused and sad? Most dates won't turn into a relationship, you can't take it personally or you are going to have a bad time.

  78. Hard to say. Some people end things because you didn't kiss, because they wanted to u and they think you didn't because you were interested. some people end things because you did kiss, and they even kissed back and seemed to enjoy it

  79. Had a very similar scenario to this a couple of months back. It’s a blow and it hurts but it’s a part of dating unfortunately. For what it’s worth take her explanation at face value and try not to overthink it. Sometimes feelings just aren’t reciprocated.

  80. Damn this is why sometimes you can’t show how much you like someone🙃🙃… sorry to hear this but you sound like a good dude you’ll be aight

  81. Happens bro. It was great for you but not for her. Try not to get too caught up in the fantasy, it was only 2 dates and they sounded pretty standard, coffee and food. Youll meet someone else.

  82. Sorry to hear this mate sure it’s made you feel quite shit. I always think of the feelings aren’t mutual then you were confused about her and thought she was someone that she wasn’t so there’s actually nothing to be sad about it that makes sense? I’ve been there though

  83. Maybe she found something out about you that turned her away? 🤷🏼‍♀️ or maybe someone from her past has come back into the picture?

  84. Smile, lift your head up, thank her for her time, and move forward OP. Leave with dignity. It happens way more than you'd believe, for something so crushing.

  85. It sucks when your perception of a date is not in line with the other party, sorry dude. But there could be some scenarios at play.

  86. Sounds most likely you were either a bit too desperate or she didn’t find you that attractive or both

  87. Absolutely do not text her again. This way, when you pop into her mind, it will be with respect. And let her go, over the next fee weeks, let her go completely. If she ever does text you back, do not seem eager. Be casual. Do not be overly sweet. Flirt. Get out of the friend zone. There are a million youtube vids on how to “get out of the friend zone” and handle rejection. Good luck. It happens to everyone. Handle it like a boss.

  88. That's life. Anyway there's a lots of fishes in the sea to fish. It doesn't mean that it's because you enjoyed, she also enjoyed your company? Sometimes things happened opposite to what you are expecting to happen. Good thing is, you still tried. Go on, don't stop trying, someday you will found the right one for you.

  89. You said you may have come on strong or potentially desperate. That's never a good look. You have to balance it out, show you're interested but not over the top. Especially if it's disproportionate to the time you've actually known a person. For me personally, I would think the guy has had no luck elsewhere and I'm like his last option or something.

  90. Sadly, chemistry and attraction happen or don’t happen despite having a great time and enjoying each other. I had the same thing happen with a very nice guy. Chatted for 2 weeks and 2 dates to be sure. I felt bad saying that I didn’t feel the physical attraction that I was looking for. Not my fault. Could it grow? Maybe…I didn’t want to prolong it though, didn’t seem fair. Hang in there, it hurts but it is not personal even if it feels personal.

  91. Enjoy you wasn't ghosted buddy, she told you and now just move on that's how it is you can't really change any no matter how much you like that person

  92. When a similar situation happened to me and this guy I thought we got on really well but I didn't fancy him strong enough romantically and didn't want to lead him on with more dates but I liked him enough to let him know we were no match. No ghosting. It's that simple. Hes a great guy and I truly wish he finds the 1 that is mad about him in the best way.

  93. It's simple, you lost the race with a different dude. If she's gorgeous then she has PLENTY of options. You said she doesn't text during the week, this makes me raise an eyebrow, both eyebrows actually, especially if your dates went as well as you described.

  94. I'll echo some other good answers in this thead. I just had a similar thing happen. Been hanging out with a friend a lot. Doing a lot of fun, datey things, but were not dates. Got feelings for her and I thought she felt the same. This past weekend I found out she doesn't. Reality is, I'm not her type. She doesn't find me attractive. It sucks, but nothing is going to change that realistically. I'll be honest that it really took a blow to my self esteem and whatnot and it's been a real rough week. I feel foolish for thinking there was attraction and misreading the signs. I feel insecure that my best self is not "her type." I feel bad about the way I went about it all. It's normal and okay to be unhappy. Rejection will always suck. Just don't take it out on others. Find distractions with other friends. Talk about it with people you trust and support you. Work to get happy with who you are again. You sound like a good person. Forgive yourself (and maybe her if you truly want to be friends) and move on. It gets better.

  95. Rejection is a crappy feeling, but one that we all experience. It’s just one of those things that you need time for. It’s always hard for people to think “this person just doesn’t like me the same way I like them”, but that’s reality sometimes. But you’ll move on and forget about her someday, promise!

  96. This stuff happens in dating all the time my guy. I recently had a girl say the same thing to me after our second date and I literally didn’t care because my expectations were low and I’ve already heard this numerous at times. Not everyone is gonna like you in that way. It is what it is

  97. At least it happened after the second date. I dated a woman for 3 freaking months with this level of chemistry and eventually got the same type of text.

  98. Accept her reason and move on. I’ve wasted too much time in my life trying figure out what went wrong. That is time I could have spent on my future.

  99. I have had dates with great chemistry that ended with no chemistry. I also noticed that they all mentioned a guy that I suspected they were still hung up on. So if you assume they matched with you, even though this was RL, because of attraction, I assume they are hung up on some guy because chemistry is hard not to notice.

  100. It happens to the best of us. I’ve had the same where she told me best time she’s ever had in her life and then pulled away. Be a man though when they pull away you accept it don’t question it and move on. This is why you keep your options open. I wouldn’t do the whole let’s be friends thing that’s just wasting your time.

  101. Don't beat yourself up over it. There was just something there missing. Don't ever think you need to change yourself to make them like you. It's the worst thing you can do. There are 100's of millions of women in this world and it's a numbers game of finding the right one.

  102. I’m not her so I don’t know what true reason is for her to not see the chemistry with you but I’m a woman and I have rejected maybe at least 500 + men in my life! Sometimes it’s something quite small! It’s nothing bad or personal about the person I rejected! Maybe I just didn’t see his character suitable to mine or maybe I personally just don’t feel that I could have a long term relationship with him in my head! Don’t beat yourself up over this! It has nothing to do with you in person! When the chemistry is not there, it’s not there! Accept it and move on

  103. I think she agreed to see you because she was without a boyfriend but suddenly her (ex) boyfriend reached out to her again. Or someone else that she was hoping to connect with finally responded. Either way OP, it's her loss. Not yours. Soon she'll regret her decision.

  104. Well on the bright side she was honest and didn’t lead you on. We can’t do nothing about how others view you. But you have 💯 percent control over you and how you could better your self. I recommend you work on your self and heal your self before you go dating more. Maybe you lacked confidence, or came off a little needy? Who knows, love on your self and do some nice things for your self. You gotta love your self for other to love on you. That energy alone will attract ppl towards you. Check out this audio book, I have recommended to many friends and they have all had positive reactions when it comes to finding a significant other

  105. And … you’re happy to be friends.. but you’re not really are you? If you had balls you wouldn’t be in this position.. she’d be chasing you .., but .. you’re too compliant and not authentic which means = friendzone

  106. She’s just not that into you, dude. It is what it is. You can’t change her mind. You can’t “be better” to her or “redo” dates. She wasn’t feeling the attraction. Take it for that. You might have thought she was the bee’s knees, but she may have thought you were only the foot. Take the experience, learn from it, and move on. Nothing really to be said other than to get over it.

  107. I’ve been on her end before, where I had an amazing time, conversation went brilliantly. If she isn’t feeling chemistry it just means she’s not attracted to you, it doesn’t mean you messed up.

  108. When I get those. It hurts. But, I never let it show. I only send back a thank you letting me know. You did the right thing. I will never beg .

  109. So, here is what you don’t understand. While this was an amazing date/conversation etc for you, it is very run of the mill for her. She is the reason y’all had a great interaction. That goes with her everywhere. Almost every interaction is like that for her.

  110. Sounds like the physical attraction / spark just wasn’t there. She probably thought you were really nice and even enjoyed spending time with you, but just didn’t have a strong physical attraction. I’ve gone on dates with 7 different women in the past 2 months and while I enjoyed the conversation, had fun, and genuinely thought they were great people, the spark just wasn’t there. At the end of the day, if you don’t have a strong physical attraction from the beginning it probably isn’t going to work. In a romantic relationship it’s a critical component, don’t let anyone fool you into thinking otherwise. Attraction tends to fade, so if it’s not there now, where will it be 6 months or 6 years from now?

  111. Sometimes you can talk with someone and they're all nice and stuff. But you're just not feeling that attraction. That doesn't mean that they're aren't attractive to you. But just that they aren't what you're looking for.

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